Dealing with Anxiety - part 2

Cognitive strategies are often effective in dealing with anxiety. I’ll use this blog to lay the ground work for understanding cognitive strategies.

There is a constant, super rapid flow of thoughts going through our brains. This flow is estimated to be around 1,300 words per minute or 45,000 thoughts per day! Your anxiety is NOT caused by circumstances, it is caused by your thoughts about the circumstances. This is a major reason why two people can be facing virtually identical circumstances and one is at peace and the other is a basket case. One person sees the stock market report a 300 point loss and thinks, “I’m being ruined!” Their neighbor sees that same report and thinks, “This stinks, but it will come back up eventually, and if not, God will provide.” One way of thinking sends our body into fight or flight the other maintains equilibrium.

This constant flow of thoughts is called by cognitive behavioral psychologists “automatic thoughts” because they are just automatically flowing through our minds nonstop. The flavor of our automatic thoughts is conditioned by what are called intermediate beliefs and core beliefs. Think of intermediate beliefs as the attitudes and “rules” about life, self and others that you have picked up through life. Some of these are “shoulds” and “oughts”. “People should always be nice to me.” “I ought to keep everyone around me at peace.” Some of these come from parents or school or society. Others are shaped by our understanding and assumptions about what the powerful people around us want from us. Some of these beliefs can lead to success in life and peace of soul. But others are “crazy makers” that set us up for anxiety, depression or failure.

A common intermediate belief is “I am worthless if everyone does not love me.” Beliefs like this are huge anxiety creating machines! A co-worker sighs and shakes her head. Suzie assumes Jane is unhappy with her (actually Jane just thought about her teen age son’s drug use) and it quickly runs through Suzie’s mind, “I’m not keeping Jane happy. Jane doesn’t love me. Therefore I am worthless.” These thoughts cause her to feel uneasy and edgy. If she feeds this way of thinking she will become more and more anxious. Keep in mind you may not be aware of this chain of thought because it is zipping through your mind so quickly. Still, it can impact your emotions powerfully.

Core beliefs are similar to immediate beliefs but more deeply seated. They are usually ancient in that we picked them up early in life. Therefore, they are deeply entrenched, rigid and firmly believed no matter how irrational they may be. They can also be hard to be aware of and very hard to change.

Next blog we will look at how to use these insights to deal with anxiety.